how to treat an infertile girl

• Ask her if she'd like to talk about her infertility, and be willing to listen. If she prefers to keep it private, that's fine, but it will mean a lot to her that you asked.
• Invite her to your baby shower, but do not expect her to attend. If you don't invite her you are treating her like she is invisible, by inviting her you are letting her know you are thinking of her. Also don't expect her to purchase a baby gift, when you are infertile, it is extremely difficult to be around baby stuff. Please don't be offended.
  
• Try not to complain about your kids too much, a little is ok.
• Never tell your infertile friend how luck she is to not have children, she does not feel luck at all, in fact chances are she feels quite the opposite, unlucky with a capital U!
• Don't joke about how easy it is for you to get pregnant "all he has to do it look at me and I get pregnant!" This type of joke is not appreciated by the infertile girl.
• Please try to put yourself in the infertile girl's shoes. "How would I feel if everyone around me had kids, is having kids, is pregnant?" It may be difficult for you when you have rugrats screaming at the top of their lungs and peeing on the carpet, but please try.
• Tell your friend she has taught you how lucky and blessed you are to be able to have children without ART (Assisted Reproductive Technology) or infertility treatment.
• Try to learn a little about infertility and treatments so you can understand what your friend is facing.
• Offer to go to a doctor's appointment with your friend if her husband is not able to attend.
• Tell your friend you can't understand what she is going through, but you'd like to try.
• Keep reminding your infertile friend you are there for her.

added 02/01/09

• Tell your infertile friend when you get pregnant, don't let her hear it through the grapevine.
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